Gettin' Dirty... kinda.

Hello, Lovelies!
I love getting my hands dirty... both literally and figuratively.
I never feel so gross (pun intended) as I do when I feel like I am doing nothing.
This has led me to a few new endeavors (I've realized I don't like the word "goal"--too focused on the end point and not enough on the journey):
1. Volunteering, again. It's been a while and it's time to put on my big girl boots, and get down and dirty for what I believe in... more details to follow.
2. Being responsible... wooah. Hold the boat on that one. I'm trying to "Be responsible for what I say and do"... yes, like the Girl Scout promise. This includes cleaning up some past "messes," but it feels really good.
I'm always adventuring and endeavoring and (other action verb here)-ing... but these are my main ones right now.
I'm pumped for classes to start up again, and ready to get back to work on studying what I love.
Much gratitude.

Humble Pie: It's like Perkins... Only Better!

Who knew Humble Pie is served up as a whole pie  and by the slice?
While my adventures have not led me so near the internet in recent weeks (who am I kidding--months), I want to reiterate the importance of what I think I'm doing. I am learning patience and appreciation like I never have before. I learning perseverance and dedication.
When I am frustrated or angry or discouraged, I think of what I am grateful for... sometimes this takes a bit of time. My first thought when I feel any of these isn't "I'm so grateful...", but taking a second even if I'm rushed to feel gratitude, even for the most simple of things, gives me different perspective.
I find this especially when what I love is what's causing the feelings. If I am getting aggravated with someone I love, I think of why I love them. If I am getting frustrated while playing roller derby, I think of why I love the sport and am grateful to be taking part. If I'm upset at work, I remember how grateful I am to have a job.
Some perspective from a person trying to live every day with love and gratitude.

oh. oh yeah, I remember now... I had a blog.
ahem, have.
I have a blog.
yesterday was my first day off in the month of July... and I'm still broke. go figure.
rather than a long list of all the awesomeness I've been creating, but rather share a few morsels.
my girlfriend (finally!) lives in the same city as me! so much love and gratitude.
trying really hard to keep positive about a few aspects of my life, and sometimes this is tough, but really what is bringing me around these days is the ideal I have created with this project.
I have started being grateful at each meal and really taking the time to enjoy my food.
I have started thanking the sun... just saying thanks in a variety of ways when I feel the urge...
Sending gratitude to people I miss, or intentionally loving people and sending them good energy, even if I am in a room with them.
I've realized there's no such things as perfect... I'm gonna be grumpy, or whatever non-happy state of being sometimes, but my ability to pull myself out of those has grown immensely from the Love and Gratitude I've been feeling this year.
So much love, ya'll.

uh oh! ten minutes til the library closes... just a quick check in, then.
my cleanse of all that is gluten-y and animal-y lasted about 2 days... it's hard. and I got whiny real fast.
words to the wise: choose one cleanse, or, as I have decided to do, just monitor and alter the intake rather than complete elimination... ways to stay un-grouchy and keep friends.
loving and gratefulness can sometimes be hard... that is a lesson this year is teaching me. finding genuine gratitude and love when I would rather be yelling at someone is not easy... not that I'm really the yelling type, but we all have our moments of weakness, don't we?
staying in touch with gratitude sometimes even makes me more mad in the instant, but in a longer span of time, I've found that nothing can call me down quite like the slice of humble pie that comes with being grateful and full of love.
oh, 2011, you lovely trickster, you.

My life feels like everything is on fast forward right now!
So much excitement!
I know I posted about PRIDE, but once again, in case you didn't get the message the first time, IT WAS AWESOME!
So... the excitement.
1. My team voted me the Team Spirit Award for our Derby Banquet! Yay! So much love and gratitude to those amazing ladies!
2. July means that this month me and my lovely girlfriend will be celebrating a year! (WHAT?!) ...and now she's going to give me a hard time for listing derby first and her second... I'm leaving it this way ;-) Love and Gratitude for a beautiful year!
3. I have been being social, like goin' out and stuff! I'm a bit of a hermit... and I am enjoying the company and the good times I have been having!
4. New job is turnin' out to be quite awesome... Love and Gratitude for all that is to come!
5. This one will sounds odd... but I am going back to being Vegan and on to a Gluten-Free diet starting today... No, I have no idea what I will eat, BUT I am excited to feel all healthy and good inside. I've done Vegan before no problem, but Gluten-Free is a new one for me, and I love pasta... but I don't like feeling icky... anyway, Love and Gratitude for the maturity in making this decision and for myself. And for not feeling gross inside. Wish me luck?

Love, Love, Love.

What a busy 13 days it has been!
Rounding out my PRIDE weekend in the Twin Cities! Wonderful times, wonderful celebrating, and wonderful organizing! Love and gratitude for the whole weekend!
Also, love and gratitude to New York!!!
I love spending entire days in pajamas with people I loved. This happened, and I am so grateful for that day!
I love car trips!
And cinnamon rolls (and figuring out how to fix recipes which I have "messed up")...
I am grateful for the new job I recently got.
I love finding old things that I lost. Read: one of my many student i.d.s I misplaced throughout my college career recently found its way out of the disk drive on my computer... yay?
I am grateful for my girlfriend... and I love her, too!
I love random adventures to surprise people!
I do not love the smell of used sponges. I do, however, love clean dishies!
I love dancing!
I am grateful for kool-aid :-)
I love spending time with friends!
Love and Gratitude, and a little extra enthusiasm!

on the loose to climb a mountain

on the loose where I am free

on the loose to live my life the way I think my life should

for I've only got a moment and a whole world yet to see

I'll be looking for tomorrow on the loose

That's the chorus from one of my fave camp songs! This time last year I was beginning my adventure as a summer camp counselor. Last summer was definitely a challenging one, but I loved my time at camp and am so grateful for the memories.

I love making up words. Grateful for my friends who put up with such quirkdom (let's go for a ride in my Fatillac)!

I love having an entire day without any obligations... I am choosing to be productive today (and thank goodness for that), but if I wanted I could have stayed in my bed all day. Grateful for me-time.

I love reading. Grateful for the reading time recently! I'm finally reading Fried Green Tomatoes!!! So. Good.

I love having someone to miss. I know I promised no mushy-ness for a while, but, this doesn't count. I am grateful for all the love I feel. xo, MJ.

Love, Gratitude and Fatitude!

I love the porch on the new place I am living. There's nothing better than coffee and sunshine in the morning. Grateful for the rays this morning.
I am grateful for this blog. I have started a new way of thinking and being grateful with this undertaking. All the lovin' is spreading to this rest of my world.
I love the lake. So much water just makes me smile. I'm grateful to live in Duluth.
Lots of lovin', yo!

I love memories and self-created philosophy.
Once upon a time there was a young woman, and though she was intelligent, she was unsure of herself. One day the woman traveled to a far away land. Ready for adventure, she left all she knew to pursue a dream of beauty. What happened next surprised the young woman. She found herself upset. Having left those who loved her she was frustrated and angry she had gone to this new land. She had drawn strength and energy from those who loved her back home. She had to take time and reflect. She learned that the strength she was lacking could be found in a different place: inside herself. Surrounded by the beauty of the new place the young woman realized that the only person she needed to feel strong was herself. That the only person she needed was herself, and that everyone else in her life was a choice. She decided from that point on to live those choices more fully. To not just be a friend or a daughter or a lover, but to fully live each of her decisions.
When I studied in Italy, this was my story. Over a year has passed since my return, and I am still so grateful for what I learned. I am grateful for the people I met on my journey, and for all the beauty I got to see.
Love and gratitude! Vivo per me... I live for me.

The past six days have been filled with moving, job hunting, friend-being and love.
I've come to a couple of really good conclusions recently.
I get caught up in nit-picking my life apart--the conclusion? I don't need my life to be perfect in order to be happy. And frankly, I don't even know what perfect means. I love being happy with how and who I am without going toward some imaginary standard... I am my own standard, and goodness knows I am plenty of a challenge to keep me on my toes.
I love being a good friend. And I love having good friends. To the new and the old, much love and gratitude!
I love spending time with my Mama! This isn't a new idea, just a reminder.
I love taking space and giving space. Space doesn't mean anything is ending, space means you understand your own and others' needs and wishes. Both gave and took space recently and all of life is better for it!
Call me silly, but I love paying for things in change. I had a huge change jar and have been using that for the past couple of days to purchase things... one change jar in my world has thus far equaled a bottled of wine, some splurge strawberry milk, a liter of diet coke for a friend pulling an all-nighter, some gas, and  a cup of coffee and a scone this morning! Cool, huh? I think so.
Here's a really new thought, the new place I am living doesn't have internet. And it's pretty cool. I am grateful that instead of hopping online before I go to sleep I am doing something more creative like reading or writing or drawing. I love feeling like I am creating rather than absorbing as my last act of the day.
What are you lovin' these days? Leave a comment if you want!

Love and Gratitude, ya'll!
Arie.

I like to say that I don't do fear.
That's not entirely true.
Who said that courage isn't not being scared, that courage is, in fact, being scared and going on, anyway?
I love that idea. I think that if I were to let fear stop me, I'd never get anything done... something can always go wrong.
I'm grateful for the people who have taught me that fear is what you make of it.
Love and gratitude!
To fearlessness (sorta)!

Hey-O! Looks who's on time!
Mushy warning!
I love my girlfriend.
I love that opposites attract.
I also love that we are not so opposite.
I'm grateful for her and all she is.
Who's lucky? This girl!
Love and Gratitude, yo.
And I promise, no more mushiness... for a while, anyway.
xoxo

Albeit my blanket-hogging tendencies which left my girlfriend quite cold, our camping trip was a success! Yes, we were a bit chilly, but we both had an awesome time! We frolicked by the river, climbed the rocks and grilled veggie burgers over the fire! And we got to make some of my infamous beer noodle soup (...Maybe if you're lucky I'll tell you had to make it someday)!
My favorite part of camping, though, is how one smells post-camping. I refer to this delicious scent as Eau de'Camp Fire. I love it!  ...Honestly wish I could bottle it up and always have that just-returned-from-tentin' smell!
Grateful for the adventures, the time with my gf, and the awesome smells!
Loved camping and all that ensued!

I love summer weather, and being able to spend time outdoors! Tonight my girlfriend and I have intentions of camping for the first time this year! I am grateful for the weather and love being outside!

Yesterday I didn't post because I was being productive! I love being productive, and feeling like I have actually accomplished something! I am grateful for everything that is going on!

Love, love, love! And gratitude!

Yesterday the internet went out here because a garage down the street burned down. I'm grateful that no one was hurt in the fire. Sending love to the people whose garage it was.

Today I am grateful for friends who care, and the common sense they have. I am sometimes not so good with common sense. I am typing this with an elevated leg, using a go-gurt as an ice pack, taking care of a bruised and swollen knee. Love to my friends (and especially my girlfriend) for taking care of me!

Love and Gratitude to all!

I love crafting. I did a redux on a shirt for the bout I am playing in tomorrow.
I am grateful for crafty time!

Most places charge extra for a double helping, but I'm giving it to you today for FREE!
Just read an article on how not to write a sales page... Alex Franzen is genius and her blog unicornsforsocialism.com is one of my faves! She's so funny (and usually right about everything). Love and Gratitude to Alex for brightening up my days with her humor and Bojangle Nutballz awesomeness (you have to read her blog to catch the reference)!
Yesterday I had an awesome practice. When blockers line up in derby, we do so on what is called a pivot line. My team is all about dancing on the pivot line before the jam starts... and I love it! Derby is fun, and my team most certainly puts the fun in Rolfunler Derby (it's a real word, I swear)!
Hope this beautiful day treats you well!
Wishin' I could be outside, but I have homework to finish up today, even though finals ended five days ago... sometimes things in life take a little longer than expected, and that is okay!
Love and gratitude to all!

Ha! Two days in a row, ya'll!
That's a record for recent times!
Today I'm grateful for AWESOME PEOPLE.
The description AWESOME is pretty elusive, and without any real definition.
But I don't ask questions on this subject. I just  know.
When someone I meet is AWESOME there's a magic button that goes off in my brain and the hallelujah chorus starts sounding while glitter cannons go off.

Okay, awesome people aren't actually that rare, but it certainly feels that way sometimes.

Anyway, I've met lots of AWESOME people recently: at the new job, getting groceries, in Canada...
And I've gotten to hang out with some of the AWESOME PEOPLE already in my life (yes!).
I love AWESOME PEOPLE.

To all those who are AWESOME, myself included!

Reflections on Roller Derby, Gratitude, and Love.

Two days shy of a month... My semester ended last Friday, and now, on Monday morning, I am at my favorite person's house, in my p.j.s, sippin' coffee.

This has been quite the month: many new accomplishments and many new ideas.

I'm pleased to say that while I have not been posting, I have kept the practice of loving and being grateful every day. I think this attitude has changed how I see... the world? That sounds far too woo-woo. What I mean to say is that I have started interrupting negative thoughts to concentrate on what is important. I have been asking myself "Do I really want to spend this energy being pissed off?" And sometimes the answer is yes, but what I have noticed, more often than not, is that I have much better thoughts in my head.

Being an athlete (what?!), I have come to realize how invaluable this kind of attitude is. Keeping my cool and loving the sport, and the people I'm sharing it with, is really my best asset right now as a player. My team is great, and this is something we are all working on, and I love it!

I also love thinking of myself as an athlete. When I was younger, my dad coached basketball, so I of course had to play. I was bad; I got the ball stolen from me by girls on my own team. I remember when I called my dad to tell him that I had finally joined a sport, he was surprised. And even more surprised when I said that I play roller derby. May marks my eighth month with the team, and I am learning every day.

I'm thrilled with how much I have grown. I have played in my first two bouts in the last month--I couldn't stand on skates when I started. The journey is where the joy is, and I am loving all of it!

With all of that in mind, I give you 28 days of lovin' and gratitude fresh off the griddle!

1. I love waking up with enough time to not be in a rush.

2. I love breakfast.

3. I love my team. They all inspire me to be a better person and skater--so much gratitude to all of them!

4. I love dancing.

5. I love pushing myself.

6. I love sharing poetry with others.

7. I love making people laugh.

8. I love laughing.

9. I love making new friends!

10. I love living with love and gratitude every day.

11. I still love the idea of learning to surf.

12. I love making lists (no, really?).

13. I love writing.

14. I love giving myself space... My mom always says "Don't beat yourself up--that's everybody else's job." I love that. No matter what, somebody is going to not like what I am doing, so I might as well support me.

15. I love tattoos.

16. I love people coming together across boundaries.

17. I love loving people.

18. I am grateful for the amazing people in my life right now. So much love.

19. I love thinking of my five best friends (or my five gems, as I like to call them!) as a constellation.

20. I love people getting involved in their communities.

21. I love that I am still drawing.

22. I love random adventures.

23. I love being responsible.

24. I am grateful for all the support I have been getting from the people in my world recently! Love to you all!

25. I love glitter--I think there needs to be more of it in my world!

26. I love me. Boom!

27. I am grateful for my new job!

28. I love learning.

Love and Gratitude, ya'll!

To 2011!

I love myself. I love having this blog.

I've got eleven days worth of lovin' to talk about.

1. I love the song "Endlessly" by Green River Ordinance... I have been listening on repeat (gratitude to the roomies for putting up with this)!

2. I love moving on... sounds bitter, but I love the moment when thoughts or feelings unquestionably need to be dropped. Making decisions for the better feels good to me.

3. I love embracing where I am... not actually contradictory to the last statement. I love recognizing just how amazing the people in my life are.

4. I love being inspired by others' arts... I've been drawing a lot of inspiration from Andrea Gibson's poetry and tattoo culture.

5. I love the smell of bon fires... and they are a burnin'! Happy Spring Time (for real)! I sat outside today while doing some homework specifically to smell the fire burning somewhere nearby.

6. I love being ridiculous. I don't always realize how ridiculous I am, but I love my oddities.

7. I love roller derby, have I mentioned this recently?

8. I love my girlfriend... I could go on forever (or Endlessly) about her. I'll stick to how lucky I am to have such a wonderful person in my life.

9. I love little celebrations--I am definitely trying for more of these in my life.

10. I love protesting. Nothing like exercising that good ol' right to free speech.

11. I love free books. I don't understand this, but seems like once or twice a semester a department at my university decides it has "too many" books. This semester's find: Spanish instructor's manuals!

So much love! And to all the beautiful chaos in my world right now: Gratitude!

6 days?! ...I'd thought it had been, like, two.
Oh well, time flies when you are having... fun?
Seriously, though, I'm doing well.
I keep talking about chaos and peace, and how I can't really seem to find balance...
I think my lack of balance comes from how I view my world.
That being said, I'm starting to see my life like an ocean, and chaos and peace as the waves.
I can't really stop 'em, and frankly it's silly for me to try.
What I can do however is learn to ride the waves...
(That's right! I'm going for a surfing metaphor!)
The more I resist the waves, the more off balance I feel.
The more I settle in with the waves, the more stable I feel.
Okay, okay, so this is all real easy to say and not so easy to act on, and I get that.
BUT I think it's a good image, and I'm a visual learner.
I'm also a hands on learner--perhaps some sea salt is in order?
...Or at least bath salts (I like where this is going)!
Anyway, a list:
1. I love my life.
2. I love the chaos.
3. I love the peace.
4. I love waves.
5. I love bath salts.
6. I love the image of me learning to surf... perhaps a goal for the summer? Lake Superior surfing is supposed to be pretty rad, although, quite cold...
Gratitude to all!

Well, hello sketch book! ...No this has nothing to do with April Fool's Day.
I LOVE creating art. Sometimes the best action for me to take on an issue is to sit and draw what I am feeling: I find that so much of my life can be connected together in this way. When I start to draw one idea, many more ideas come together. I love how this works in my brain, even though I don't really understand.
I'm grateful for me, my brain and my sketch book...
maybe someday I'll show you some of my sketches. maybe.
Love and Gratitude!

Double-decker, it is!
Finicky internet is better than no internet, yes?
For yesterday:
I remembered how much I love little bars that are too crammed and dirt cheap. I went to a dive with some of the gals from my team after practice... and I loved it. Grateful for the experience and many two dollar grilled cheeses to come!

Today I love making connections across what seem to be insurmountable barriers. I have a lot more in common with a well-intentioned conservative than a trash-talking liberal. Here's to the folks I spoke with today, and to respect amongst disagreement. So grateful for the experience.

I love beginnings. I am starting a new job this Thursday and am excited for a fresh start.
I am grateful for the new job.

I love grass roots activism.
I spoke at the city council meeting tonight (my third time addressing the council in the past 4 years).
I was one of many who spoke on making our city a more welcoming place by taking a proactive stand on immigration policy.
Much gratitude and love to all who attended!

I love my post-derby shower.
I am so grateful to not be sweaty.

The hardest part of this blog is limiting each day to one (or one-ish) thought.

I don't remember if I have said this before... but there are no rules about posting about this twice.

I have talked of re-occurring themes, and clearly love and gratitude are part of this category.

I am so grateful for love.

I am thinking of one person in particular right now.

She is showing me so much about life, is so kind I stop in the middle of my day, and is such a light I can feel her glow no matter where I am.

This is for her, and how grateful I am for her love.

I love you.

I love poetry.
And I love reading my poetry aloud.
I am grateful for these opportunities.

Today goes to my beautiful and talented friend, Sara.

We met right before we turned sixteen and have managed to remain friends for the six plus years between then and now (not always an easy task, I might add). Sara is a wonderful person, and a true inspiration. I am so grateful to have in her in my life!

Happy Birthday, Sara!

I love you!

--Mariposa.

My blizzard didn't happen, seems like the snow hit the rest of MinSNOWta, but Duluth got left out. We certainly have had plenty of wind today, though, to make up for the snow's absence. If one bit of weather doesn't show up, a substitute needs to show up, right?
Anyway, this wind made huge waves on the lake. I didn't get down to the shores at all (and didn't really want to), but viewing the waves from up the hill was gorgeous.
Grateful to live in a beautiful city that I love.

I love blizzards, and although today is March 22nd, there is one on the way... Happy living in Duluth! Here's hoping for a snow day and lots of hot chocolate! (I would be very grateful).

I am grateful for picnics and poetry.
I love being outside and I love words.
I love the person I shared these with today.

I am grateful for slowing down.

And speeding up.

I'm grateful for energy.

And even restlessness.

I'm grateful for tomatoes.

And kisses.

I'm grateful for baking.

I'm grateful for beauty.

I love.

Here's to love.

I love all the different forms love takes on.

To all those I love, in all the ways I love: I love you.

And am so grateful for you.

(all together now: awwwwww).

"Fear is only a verb if you let it be."
--Andrea Gibson.
Words to live by, huh?
Life is hard right now.
Trying my best to listen to Andrea... this quote has become a mantra of sorts for me.
I love being me. I love my life. I love taking ownership of  my life and my actions.
p.s. My Christmas Cookies just happened! Made my first-ever batch of Russian Tea Cakes! Yum!

I love possibilities.
Right now I have so much up in the air: looking for a new place to live, looking for a new and/or additional jobs, looking for what I want to do with what I'm learning, looking-as always--to learn more about everything... I am delightfully searching.
And I love being okay with that.
I've always loved possibility when I knew what was coming next... these days I have no clue.
And I think that's delicious.
I'm loving the surprises life and I are creating.
To me! To those I love! To 2011!
(Plans for making Christmas cookies tonight are in the works!--perfect St. Patty's Day celebration? I think yes!)

There's a sign to how my March has been going: my last post was February 28th.
Seriously, though, life is awesome. I love being busy...  and right now I am learning so many lessons in balance.
So what have I been up to for the past 16 days (We'll call it  March 16th, as my clock say 12:35 am--I need to figure out how to change the posting time!)?
A lot of loving and a lot of being grateful...
1. I love my family. Easy to say, but hasn't always been like that. I am one to speak my mind, and that doesn't always go so... well. But these days I am finding ways to love people I disagree with... a huge step. And get this: I am grateful for them, too.
2. I love my chosen family. There are so many people who I have decided are family over the years, and all for different reasons, but the bottom line is they are awesome. And I am so grateful to have them in my life.
3. Peanut butter... I was waxing mushy already. Peanut butter with chocolate. Peanut butter with strawberry jam. Peanut butter by itself. I love peanut butter.
4. Rainy days have always been my favorite kind of day. I feel so inspired by cool air and fog... kind of contradictory to my sunny personality, but nothing gets my noggin going like the sound of rain hitting the roof above me.
5. When I was younger (recent younger), I would loathe people attempting to take care of me. And now that I am pretty far into the real world and very much so take care of myself, I am so grateful when people take the time to do something special for me. (I am ridiculous in the number of times I say thank you if someone cooks me dinner!) I never understood how nice it is to be taken care of, and now I do! Thanks and love to those who take the time to take care of me.
6. I love pillows, especially in the moment when my head first lands. The deep breath in of "finally" and my head sinking lower. I love how peaceful that moment is between me and my pillow.
7. I love surprising people.
8. I do not love making mistakes (who does?), but I love recognizing that I have made a mistake and working to fix it.
9. I am a loyal person. And I love this about myself.
10. I feel really strongly. No matter what the topic is, I have an opinion or a thought or a feeling. Sometimes, I get irritated with myself for this, like "REALLY? Can I just let this one go?" I don't always feel the need to comment on my feelings anymore (thank goodness!), but I have also come to appreciate my passion. I love embracing myself in this way.
11. I  love hot tubs. Done and done.
12. I love being unapologetic in my beliefs. I think owning up to our thoughts is key to being happy.
13. Cleaning can be so good for me if I'm stressed. I feel less stressed after I clean and I have a clean room. Win-win situation: Love it!
14. This sounds funny coming from a gal with a blog, but blogs are way neat! I've been following galadarling.com and I don't always agree with what she has to say, but I really like her (Especially how unapologetic she is!). I love having a fun moment reading her and looking at the photos!
15. I'm all about going with the flow these days. I love not making a big fuss and just enjoying myself. Sounds simple, but it's a new concept to me. And I think I am developing an appreciation for simplicity along with balance.
16. Keeping up with the news makes me feel empowered. I love knowing I can make a difference, and the first step is knowing what is happening.
So there you have it: 16 days worth of the so-aptly-named March Madness.
To Love and Gratitude and Balance and Year-Round Christmas Cookies (I have yet to make good on this promise to myself!) and Simplicity!

I don't think it's true that grown-ups can't us the word "grown-up," or else they lose their grown-up status.
"Grown-up" is fun to say, regardless of age or maturity.
Which leads me to today's post: it's about grown-up things.
I started a savings account!
There's not much in it... BUT I'm really excited.
The account is my I'm-graduating-May-2012-and-want-to-move-somewhere-neat-shortly-there-after fund.
(Got a nice ring to it, don'cha think?)
Anyway, I love being a grown-up and I love doing grown-up things.
And I am thanking myself now, because I will be thanking myself later.
To me!
To 2011!
(To May 2012!)

Today gets a double-decker posting.
I was asked at work yesterday what I was going to do after I graduate from college, and my answer went a little something like this:
"Um... play roller derby and write poetry."
Oh good. Sounds promising.
I hadn't really articulated that before
(or not in that order, anyway. And definitely not as the primary answers... ).
I usually come up with something like
"I plan on working for non-profits or NGOs to end all forms of violence."
The poetry is a secondary thought.
And roller derby... well, I feel like I'm in third grade and she just moved here from out of town and got sat in the desk right next to me and so we're insta-besties.
I'm actually pretty amused by how quickly roller derby has become a big part of my life.
A question I have had the same answer to for a while is
What do you love?
The ready-response is:
"I love people and words. The rest is secondary."
I'm tacking on roller derby.
To people and words and roller derby.
To love and gratitude.
To 2011.

Alrighty. Happy Sunday.
I feel like my life is humming back and forth between entirely chaotic and totally peaceful... usually not what I strive for (read: balance). However, I'm quite happy, and while there are those chaos-inspired panic moments I feel generally pretty grounded.
Ever read the book Eat, Pray, Love? I know Elizabeth Gilbert has been dogged on a lot for this book, but I think she has some really good things to say.
One of my fave quotes was from her friend she calls Wayan (all names were changed for privacy).
Wayan says "To lose balance sometimes for love is part of living a balanced life."
True that.
I love Liz for her appreciation for self-love, self-understanding and self-respect.
I also love how she finds teachers everywhere.
To the nay-sayers I say: I like the book.
And thanks to Liz for writing it... this wasn't intended to be about the book, but it definitely fits.
Here's to me (And Wayan! And Liz!).
And to 2011!

I am grateful for chapstick.
I love my lips not feeling like they're about to fall off.
Thanks, chapstick!
(May your 2011 be filled with soft and hydrated lips?)

I am grateful for my body. I love being able to move the way I do.
Here's to me and my body!

"I give myself a headache."
--me.
I love being me, but sometimes, even I don't understand how my brain works. How I can forget so easily or be distracted.
I blogged yesterday to "catch up" and forgot to blog for yesterday... enter the quote above.
So I'll be doubling up today, and then will be on track. For now.
I worked during the afternoon and evening on Tuesday. I am grateful to have a job in general, and to have the one I have. I love the feeling of supporting myself. And while I do need outside help occasionally, I love that I can take care of myself.
Today I remembered how much I love libraries. Sitting on the floor between shelves and looking through books just makes me happy. I am so grateful for the access I have to libraries, too.
To Love and Gratitude, 2011!

Wow... 3 days to post about!
I have had so much going on and let my blog slip to the back burner, but again, I refuse to get down on myself for this... I have had an excellent couple of days.
Number one thing I have learned while away: I am so grateful for the people in my life.
There are so many awesome people in my life.
My Saturday was spent with many great people.
So much love.
Sunday brought carmel rolls. With great people. Definitely a win-win for all involved. Who doesn't love bouncing around the kitchen, singing along with Regina Spektor, and baking for loved ones? Grateful for the laughter shared and the carmel rolled.
Monday (and part of Sunday which carried over to Monday) involved cleaning. And lots of it. I love the feeling of everything being in order and simply catching-up... I never realize how disorganized or how far behind I am until I start figuring out just where I am.
Grateful to be sitting in my newly organized world. I love it.
To us, 2011, and all the beauty and chaos you will bring!

I love my friends and I am so grateful for them.

I love not giving up.
And I am way grateful for the perseverance I've established in myself.
Here's to all the awesome.
(GO TEAM ARIELLE!)

I love poetry. Especially when the poetry is read aloud by the person who wrote the poem. I have a special love for slam poetry and spoken word, but really, anyone who's got the nerve to write down some words and get up in front of people to read them is way cool in my book.
Props to all the self-expressin' and self-lovin' poets out there!
Much gratitude to you all.

So people with grown-up jobs have the option of working-from-home sometimes, and so I decided today that I could do the same. I got up at my usual time for a Tuesday and proceeded to stay in my p.j.'s, make pancakes from scratch, and have a big ol' cup of tea. I stayed in my bed working until a little before 2 pm and got much homework done. And I loved it.
A very productive morning... which I am grateful for.
Also, today is a very special friend's birthday and I am so, so grateful for her and all she is in my life!
Love all around.

I spent too much time yesterday lovin' myself and those around me and forgot to spread the lovin' here... I love an excuse to celebrate love. Save the it's-all-about-capitalism idea and enjoy the day. I'm my own valentine first and foremost every year. Then my mom. And then from there the list grows... I always end up with many valentines. And that's just the way I like it. Spread the love, ya'll!
(...will you be my valentine?)
Gratitude and Peace (and Love!),
Arielle

I am grateful for my internet working right now... There have been complications with in and out reception (I'm not sure if that is the proper word). Anyway, I definitely take for granted the fact that the internet works from my bed most of the time. And I do love being able to turn assignments in online (and blogging, of course!).
Best to all!

I love getting organized in my planner. I have the next three weeks all written out, high-lighted and dated, and it feels awesome. I'm grateful to myself later on when I take the time to get organized now.

I love animals. And I am grateful for having them in my life... today's adventures involved much fun and frolicking with kittens and puppies (who knew pug puppies were so adorable?!).
May your 2011 be filled with cuteness!

I love making connections in my head.
Obscure or ordinary, far-fetched or blatant I love that some things just make sense together within the walls of my brain. Things that no one else would think of.
(I had some really good ones of these today!)
I am grateful for how fun this is to do.

"A person who knows how to laugh at himself will never cease to be amused."
--Shirley MacLaine (Think what you want, because I love this quote!)

I love being happy.
And I am so grateful that I have the ability to make myself happy.
Love all around, 2011!

I love one woman parties. I don't have them enough. I am very grateful for the one I had today.

Today I'm grateful for awesome people. I spent my day with many awesome people in a variety of situations... I love awesome people.

I am grateful for being humbled... and while I don't always love how being humbled feels, I love the outcomes.
To us, 2011!

I love cleanliness... this isn't one of my strong points, as cleaning frequently falls to the bottom of my priority list. But I really do love having things clean (and even the cleaning process). I'm grateful for the feeling of accomplishment I get when things are clean in my world.

I love sounds. I frequently find myself stopping to listen: jars untwisting, brooms sweeping, people walking... I listen. I love to take them in and feel the vibrations, however subtle. I am grateful for sounds and the variety of them.
(To a noisy 2011?)

I love spontaneity (isn't that word spelled weird?)! As I am maturing I find that I am suppressing my spontaneous urges more frequently... I think this can be both good and bad. Again, all of this sounds an awful lot like balance. I am grateful for my spontaneous urges and also the judgement to know when to give in to them.
To us, 2011!

I love being in a good mood. And I am in such a good mood right now. The live-and-let-live, the I-got-this, the I-don't care-if-things-don't-go-my-way days... I love them. And I'm really grateful to have days I feel unstoppable.

I love to take a bath. The more time I spend writing this blog, the more I realize I am grateful for the times I slow down. I am grateful to have the time to spend on myself and my well being.
To a bath-filled 2011!

I love to make decisions. Sometimes decision making is scary with all the questions they include: what will actually happen, what will I think of myself and, in some cases, what others will think. With that in mind, I love to make decisions I feel good about (and that sometimes means dealing with others' negative opinions of me).
I love trusting that I know me and my situation best. I love to struggle over a decision and take my time, and I also love making spur of the moment decisions (these are more so about temporary things like hair cuts, but I still love them).
I am grateful to be able to make decisions for myself.

I am getting a little behind the band wagon on postings recently, but this blog is all about love. I think a big part of love is understanding, and I am working on that aspect in self-love. I am trying to take the time I spend on trying to understand friends on trying to understand myself... there aren't any huge barriers, but I think people can always be listened to more in a loving and understanding way and I am spreading this to myself. I am loving myself and grateful for me.

I love to trust people, and I love when people trust me.
There are a lot of applicable circumstances in my world these days of functioning trust.
I am so grateful for trust and the ability to trust.
To us, 2011!

I am grateful for sleep and I love to sleep... I love sleep so much that I fell asleep last night and forgot to post! Oh well, here's to a beautiful 2011 with enough sleep for all!

COMFY PANTS!
Goddess praise the glory of COMFY PANTS!
No, seriously. I just got some new comfy pants and have been looking forward to getting home for the sole reason that I get to put them on.
I love comfy pants, and I am so grateful for them.

I love encouragement.
I think that supporting myself and supporting others, and having others support me is one of the greatest things in the world.
I am so grateful for the encouragement I am receiving in my life right now from a number of different places.
Love and Gratitude,
Arielle

I am grateful for love. Seems odd I haven't said this yet because it's an idea that is so essential to this blog (the idea which started this, my mom's calendar, was all about being grateful for love). Love takes hold in many forms: self-love, friend love, family love, romantic love, feeling love from other sources ( I like to think that the sun sends me love!)... Love is all around me (and us!--but I was trying not to get too preachy, oh well). I am grateful for the ability to create and send out love to others, and am grateful for being able to receive love.

Best,

Arielle

I love celebrations, from the Friday afternoon "I'm done!" to the "Wow! I can't believe I've been alive for this many years!" and all the exclamations in between.
The extra "This is awesome!" really pumps up my day (or week or...) and makes me grateful for where I am!
Here's to celebrating life in all its wonder, love and challenges!
And to us, 2011!

Today I am grateful for random acts of kindness.
I both received and gave today in this sense.
Love to the guy who gave us a ride when we ran out of gas on a highway.
Love to the gal whose car I helped jump.
Best,
Arielle

I am grateful for laughter.
And I love to laugh.
I once heard Maya Angelou speak, and I credit her when with the best advice I've ever been given.
She said "Laugh."
No matter what, keep laughing.
Today included much laughter, and that is just the way I like my days.
With Love and Gratitude,
Arielle

As I've said before, I live in northern Minnesota, and this morning when I headed for the bus stop it was negative 31... which translates to 63 degrees below freezing.  Now that we've hit the afternoon we're up to only six below.
All of this makes me grateful for long underwear.
I'm not sure who first thought of wearing an extra pair of comfy pants under regular pants, but whoever they are, they have my love for today!
To the inventor of long johns, and to how beautiful Lake Superior is in this kind of weather!
(Photo credit, Charles Curtis, Duluth News Tribune)

So yesterday was the first day I down right forgot to post (not bad for 20 days!) which means I'll be posting twice today.
I had, however, thought the day before about what I was going to be grateful for yesterday.
I'm grateful for slowing down. This is similar to my post from earlier about getting caught and having to slow down, now I'm talking about simply realizing how fast I'm going through life and stopping to appreciate myself and my surroundings a bit more.
All of this was brought on by chocolate cake.
I was bustling about doing laundry, doing homework, cleaning... all the usual multi-tasking habits I have when I remembered the chocolate cake in the kitchen. I really wanted some of this chocolate cake, so I finish up whatever task I was on, and went down to the kitchen. I didn't even grab a plate. I had the piece of cake in my hand and was on my way to go check on the wash when I asked myself "What's the point of  eating this cake I wanted if I'm not going to take the moment to enjoy it?"
I didn't have an answer.
And so I stood there half way out of the kitchen, with the cat staring at me, and really enjoyed that piece of chocolate cake.
I love this story. And am grateful for the moment I shared with myself and the chocolate cake (and the staring cat).
Best,
Arielle

I am really grateful for washing machines.
This is another one that I haven't thought about before, but as I was putting in laundry today I realized how convenient it is to just add clothes, add soap and push start, then come back later and it's done! In the time that my laundry is getting done, I have made lunch, chatted with a roomie,  am writing this blog post and will get some school work done, too. I love the ability to do multiple things at once when I am trying to be productive. I can instantly double what I have done. And yes, I take credit for the machine's work, and someday when the robots take over I will be on their list of silly humans.
At least they won't be able to call me ungrateful.

I am grateful for education.
I'm a student and I love school.
Today was the first day of a new semester and I'm really excited for all my classes to get underway.
I think learning is constantly happening throughout life, not just in the classroom, but people coming together for the purpose of education is wonderful and unique.
Here's to an excellent semester and a 2011 full of learning!
Best,
Arielle

My yearly tradition for MLK Day is to listen to "I Have a Dream."
This year I'm adding a bit: I'm thinking about the dreams I have today and how his work laid a way for so much social justice work.
Love and Gratitude to Martin Luther King Jr., for all he did and all his legacy continues to do.

Musical theatre is one of the great treats in my life.

So deliciously absurd, and wonderfully absorbing.

I wish I had the time to choreograph each excerpt of my life, and if only I had a rocking melody to carry me from scene to scene (Granted I do dance randomly, and make up songs about my life as I go through my day-to-day, but all of them are impromptu and not nearly so polished as musical theatre).

I love all aspects of this special breed of entertainment and enjoyment.

Here's to a song (and dance!) filled 2011!

I'll be doubling up on today's posts as yesterday I was not able to.
I am grateful for tenderness.
The extra 'I love you,' the softness of lips on my forehead, the sound of someone's heartbeat from their chest: I love these moments.
And the person who I share them with.
To us, and to 2011!

Today I am grateful for pain meds.

I love adventures.
I think in my world, almost any outing can count as an adventure (read: "I'm going on an adventure to the grocery store!).
That being said, I had an adventure today with two of my favorite people in the entire world that included books, ravioli, escalators, theatre and coloring--what's not to love?
Here's to all of my adventures, both big and small, which I am so grateful for!
To us,  2011!
Arielle

Today I am grateful for Roller Derby!
I am off to practice in a few minutes and am way excited that we are scrimmaging tonight.
I have only been skating for a few months, but am already so in love with the sport.
I have never been athletic, but Derby is definitely changing that.
I feel so accomplished when I am skating.
I love how it feels to play the game, getting hit and staying up or blocking others out of the way, just feels good. I think a full contact sport on wheels is probably one of the greatest ideas. Ever.
It's fun to have something that isn't serious, is a blast, and gets me moving.
Here's to you, me and Roller Derby, 2011!

I love lunch dates.
My mom is in town for the night, and she and I just ate a late lunch out.
A glass of wine and great food with awesome company is the perfect middle of the day treat.
I'm grateful for all the lunch dates we've shared.
Best,
Arielle

I am grateful for warmth. I feel like--when broken down--everything seems so simple.
As a person living in northern Minnesota, heat is a necessary part of existence.
I have never stopped to consider the option of having no heat.
That seems pretty simple, too.
I just checked the thermometer, and we are at 19 above zero (which is kind of warm for this time of year).
Here's to taking that extra time to be grateful, and send out love.
To us 2011.

I love doing hard work.
Physically, mentally, emotionally hard work.
Work that challenges me and makes me ask questions.
I actually like the feeling of not getting the answer on the first go around, and having to try again.
I am also grateful for these experiences. I think a large part of who I am comes from the time I have spent not getting the result I want at first.
Best,
Arielle

I love made beds.

I don't typically give myself this simple pleasure.

I always think I'm in too much of a hurry... when in reality, making my bed takes three minutes.

I love that there are such simple things that make me quite happy.

I think part of making this year one of love and gratitude means giving myself the simple things that make me happy.

It's like Robin Hood: take from the time-rich (what I spend too much time on) and give those minutes to  the time-poor (what I don't spend enough time on). Easier said than done, but this year is all about goals, and that sounds an awful lot like balance to me.

(Here's to Love, Gratitude, Balance, Appreciation and Year-Round Christmas Cookies!)

Best,

Arielle

"Fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth." --Pema Chodron
"Love your sense of fear if you feel you're still alive." --Me... at 17.
I divide fear into two categories: good fear (or productive fear) and bad fear (or unproductive fear).
Bad fear makes me question myself and my abilities without any real consequence other than making me give in sooner than I otherwise would. But, any bad fear can be changed into good fear.
Good fear feeds me. It gets me to step on a stage to read my words, to tell someone how I feel, to try something for the first time, or to hold up a sign at a protest.
I love that feeling: the burning in my limbs and chest that washes away with action in waves of courage and energy.
I love fear in this sense, the fear that leads to something great.
--Arielle

I know this seems a little behind, but I found a tray of them on sale last night and couldn't resist.
I love Christmas cookies.
I'm not religious, but there's something so sweet (get it? I'm talking about cookies!) surrounding the time of year.
Whether they are sprinkled, chewy, chocolatey, nutty, frosted, crunchy, jellied, drizzled or sugared, I love them all.
Christmas cookies bring me joy, and I think this joy would permeate throughout the year if I made Christmas cookies year-round... and so my list grows!
To Love, Gratitude, Balance, Appreciation and Year-Round Christmas Cookies!
What an awesome 2011 this is shaping up to be!

I'll be doubling up on the posts today as some technical difficulties made yesterday's posting not possible.
Yesterday I decided I am grateful for the moments life makes me slow down.
I frequently find myself over-scheduled and dreading my to-do list, and in this situation, the last thing I want is to get stuck waiting somewhere longer than I have to... but I have come to realize that these are the moments that I am to take as a little extra me time. If I'm in my car stuck in traffic, at a light, or behind a train, I pump the radio a little louder and dance in my seat. Or turn off the radio and just breathe. If I'm in a waiting room of whatever sorts, I help myself to the free coffee and chill. When my gut reaction is to freak out and stress over whatever it is I'm not getting done, I take the time to remind myself that this is a moment for me. And for this I am grateful: the moments life makes me slow down and for the perspective to see these moments for what they are.
Best,
Arielle

"I want you sleepy-eyed in the morning..."

"I want you sleepy-eyed in the morning..."
--Andrea Gibson (she's one of my fave spoken word artists, from the poem "Wasabi")
This morning I am grateful for waking up next to someone I love.
I am definitely the cuddling-type and don't think sharing a bed is awkward in the least. Whether the lucky person is my significant other, a best friend or my mom, I love waking up next to someone who I think is totally rad, and thinks the same about me.
(And I am grateful for all the people who are on my cuddle list, too!)
May your 2011 be full of cuddles and love!

Idea Exchange or the Way Appreciation Came to Be.

Today I am grateful for the exchange of ideas.
Similar ones, contradicting ones, disembodied ones: all of them.
After good conversations with coffee at a corner table, I was reminded of how much I love talking with people. I don't sit and appreciate others ideas--or my own--and the exchange that takes place with untimely caffeine in dimly lit cafes enough. I feel like my list of goals (resolutions) for this year is growing... love, gratitude, balance and, now, appreciation.
To us 2011!

Me Time and We Time: Balance.

I love hanging out with myself. Whether I'm chilling in my room writing and listening to music, taking myself out to dinner and a movie or simply sitting alone and thinking, I'm a cool person to be with.
That being said, I also love spending time with people. Whether we are all sitting and reading in our worlds, cooking together or off on an incredible adventure, I dig the time I spend with people.
I truly believe that too much of any good thing can be bad, and so I am grateful for balance.
Balance is something I am constantly striving for, enough Me Time in correspondence to We Time, enough sleep in correspondence to awake, enough organization in correspondence to stress... this will be a theme of my 2011... So, 2011: a year of love and gratitude (and balance!).
Best,
Arielle

People and Words: The Loves of My Life.

I am going to start simple. When asked what I love, I respond "People and words, the rest is secondary." Or that has been my response recently.
I love the people in my life. I don't know how I have come across so many amazing people, but I have.
I am grateful for the love and the adventures. The late nights drinking coffee in the corner booth. The support we give and receive. All our laughter. There are so many stories...
Stories are next, because stories are words. And with words, I can do anything.
I love words because they are my chosen way of dealing with the world, and loving the world (and all matters in between). Words flesh out and make physical where it is that my brain sees itself.
And for all of this I am grateful.
With Love and Gratitude,
Arielle

January First... the First of Many, and an Introduction of Sorts.

I am setting out with quite a daunting task ahead of me: a year of love and gratitude. This started from an idea out of a class; the title was "Mothering and Motherhood: Institution and Experience," and what I learned was how much my mom rocks. After a tough year in 2010, I wanted to make my mom a gift. I don't like living in a different place than my mom, but the fact is I am very happy living where I am (which is two hours away from my mom).
I know my mom's aware that I love her, but I wanted a way to have her feel that love everyday. And so I made her a calendar. Thinking of 365 ways I love my mom got me thinking: I spend a lot of time not loving and being ungrateful.
For someone so keen on self-love and happiness I haven't really been living my talk. I spend a lot of time pissed off and complaining.
So here's the goal: to make 2011 a year of love and gratitude (call it a resolution for the New Year if you want).
Each day I will set aside time to love.
I intend to post about what I love each day.
I want to inspire myself and others to take the time to consciously love and be grateful.
This seems more simple than I anticipated, but that's okay. I think there's something to be said for positive energy getting sent into the air. There isn't enough positive energy just for the sake of happiness, and I think any love being expressed is good.
So this is a challenge to myself, and you, if you'll take it, to set aside some of each of the coming 365 (or now 364) days for love and gratitude.
Best, Arielle